Monday, July 20, 2009

Kambaqt ishq – Kambaqht movie

I know I had promised Himesh bhai that my blog would have only His movies’ reviews. But I have to make an exception for the masterpiece ‘Kambaqth Ishq’ maybe because the copyrighted himesh dialogue ‘back off’ was used in one scene. My friends and I decided, much against expert opinion, to watch this movie in the theatre. I was hoping that Akshay Kumar’s farting spree - which included farts like Welcome, Singh is King, Tashaan, and CCTC - would come to an end, whereas Kareena’s striping spree would continue.

The highest point was right before the movie started because everything went downhill from the beginning itself. To call the wedding party melee as donkey stuff would be an insult to donkeys. And when you thought things couldn’t get worse, there were jokes like an actor trying to make a joke of the words ‘suar’, sue and ‘suee’ (needle) sounding the same. Another joke was when Akshay shouts that he wants imported anaesthesia instead of local anaesthesia.

The movie hit new lows with each scene, and so did kareena’s neck line. The only thing going high was amrita’s hem line. In today’s materialistic films, it was ironical to see serious shortage of dress material. The film was trying really hard to make people laugh. One should watch the scene where Akshay is searched for drugs. Disgusting. I can’t imagine any right minded person enjoying such stuff. Kareena kept giving slutty looks throughout the movie. The songs fared no better. There was just noise. But then that helped them blend with the movie which also was noise.

The director seemed to have forgotten the old adage, once in a hole, stop digging! He tried desperately to spice up a weak script with words like bitch and bastard at regular intervals. The dry scenes were flooded with people in minimal clothing. Okay the blonds were usually attractive, but how can you keep staring for hours at a string of skimpily dressed babes on a big screen?

For those who like some story and logic, I am afraid they too will be disappointed. The story is the same old ‘guy gal hate each other and then fall in love’. Game set match to Cliché. The movie bordered on a porno flick in the sense the only aim of the movie was to show skin. To hell with a storyline. Logic too took a serious beating in some scenes, like when gangsters couldn’t catch kareena and amrita running away on foot. The locales of some scenes were great though. And I think that was the only high point of this tamasha.

About the guest stars. Stallone does well with his growling and dishum dishum. Denise was lukewarm, or maybe she was hot but kareena had stolen all the thunder and heat by then. The movie ends as expected with an ending that might have been happy or sad. I don’t know which because I didn’t find any story. I feel we should have been awarded a certificate of appreciation for our courage and determination to sit through 3rd degree torture on a Saturday night.


  1. hahhaa really good post :D more reviews pleej.. i think we need to raise some money to be tortured and then write reviews.

  2. u shud work as a prof critic....ur wasting ur review talent :P ...u hav an excellent style of writing reviews...

  3. I agree word to word with your post! And Kareena says it was a movie to be watched leaving ur brain at home... What nonsense,it required eyes, ears, all the senses to be left behind!

  4. @Raja.. I rarely watch movies.. n to my good luck i catch such master pieces! Hope to catch another master piece b4 i leave! :D

    @ chosen1.. Dat cud be my side profession! Thanks fr d compliment..

    @vasudha.. i think dat movies shud be watched in a theatre from home, if u knw wat i mean.. :D
    Keep ur entire self at home!

  5. I hope the film is at least worth downloading from DC and watching in hostel :P

  6. after this post ..i solemnly believe that you really do write for the betterment of mankind ...!!

  7. Excellently written review. I agree, you should become a critique. Though I wonder why you brought upon this torture yourself when every thing about KI starts with a "Do better things with your time..." or "The extent to which you enjoy this is the extent to which your standards have fallen.."
    Lolism. Sad, wonder if Denise Richards, Stallone and Routh know the story and the shit they acted in!

  8. @chimu.. it maybe worth downloading.. but i m nt sure if it is worth watching!

    @will-o-the-wisp.. i hope a few of my blog readers cancelled plans of goin 2 d movie after reading this post..

    @full of life.. we went for the movie as we didnt hv ne other plans on a rainy saturday night.. n btw some ppl did seem to enjoy the film!